Not Letting Him Steal My Peace...
I'm sure many of you know the saying, "God giveth, and God taketh away." Well yesterday, for me, this rang very true.
I had an awesome morning with packed classes and so much incredible energy from my students. I was over the moon about our win for Best Yoga Studio in 201 Magazine's, Best of Bergen 2017! And just as I was taking a photo to post on social media, I received a very jarring text. It was as if someone had just punched me in the stomach.
It was a disagreement with someone I was working with. Not even a disagreement really because until that moment, I had no idea that he was even upset. To me it was a simple misunderstanding that could have easily been resolved. Except he didn't want to resolve it. And he didn't want to hear what I had to say either. He didn't reply to my texts or pick up my call. His mind was already made before he had even sent the text. And he just left me hanging and didn't even give me the opportunity to discuss it. And for me, I think that's probably what hit me hardest. I don't like confrontation as it is, so unresolved confrontation is even worse for me. It can literally send my stomach into instant knots and sickness.
In addition, I was frustrated because not only was I hurt by the way the situation was handled but now I had to find a solution to my problem. There was work to be done, but no one to do it. My blood pressure had risen and I could feel my body starting to shake. Not being able to express my feelings was sending me into an instant tizzy. At that moment, I got up and went and sat in the dark studio, with no lights on, and began to cry. I picked up my phone a few times, wanting to send an angry text, wanting to call again. But I put my phone down and just went back to my breath, over and over, "breathe". My yoga breathing is 100% what got me through that moment.
Within thirty minutes, I pulled myself together and started coming up with solutions to fix the problem. I began reaching out to contacts who I thought could help connect me with someone else to help. And I got back to being happy about our accomplishment and I re-focused on what I had planned to do during the day at my office. I decided simply, that I would not let him steal my peace.
It's an amazing thing that can happen when you get super clear on your goals. When you have laser focus and clarity on where it is that you're going, nothing and no one can set you off track. I'm so clear on what I need to accomplish this year and with that in my heart, it was simple to go back to happy. I'm not saying that I still didn't have that rough feeling in my belly. But what I am saying is that I knew putting my energy into this negative situation was fruitless. It wasn't going to move me towards my goals so therefore it was no longer worth my energy. I took my moment, I felt what I needed to feel but I knew that I had to keep it moving.
And no, I don't believe that God was taking away from me. I think maybe the universe was testing my strength. It was just a little pothole along the road. I decided not to let it become a full on road block. There will always be potholes but we've got to quickly swerve out of their path when we see them coming. Here's to having faith that we'll all miss the next pothole, and if we don't, let's at least know how to change a tire!
Happy Sunday friends! And don't let anyone steal your peace!